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No 77                                                                             November 2005

I'd rather have a bowl of... crack?

Con Doherty
Thursday 23 June 2005

Kellogg's might have made a slight error in their new product's name, writes Con Doherty

Kellogg's Coco Rocks: at least they didn't go with the name "Kellogg's Coco Methamphetamine Hydrochloride"

You wouldn't normally put crack cocaine and breakfast food in the same basket. But thanks to a mix-up at cereal giant Kellogg's, the two have become synonymous.

The marketing monkeys behind the innocuous little chocolatey Kelloggs' Coco Pops thought they were on safe ground when they launched Coco Rocks, the exciting new jungle-inspired spin-off of the cereal. Unfortunately for them, they don't seem to have done their research among the highways, byways and alleyways of London's drug dens.

The new cereal brand launched in the UK earlier this year. But it has become an object of fun for drug-users and specialists. Coco Rocks to them means something very, very different - though, admittedly, it still has that nice chocolate overtone. The term is street slang for "dark brown crack cocaine made by adding chocolate pudding during production", according to the latest drugs guides available.

"You'd think people like Kelloggs would have teams of people checking new brand names out to see what they might mean," said a spokeswoman for leading drugs advice charity Drugscope, who's clearly been reading the same drugs guide as us. "Coco rocks is a term used to describe dark brown crack made by adding chocolate pudding during production. God knows why anyone would want to do that, but they do.

"It's logged in our library and has been around since at least 2003, so, I think Kelloggs might be getting a bit of a shock when they find out about it."

And indeed they did. Vicki Barton, a public relations spokeswoman for the cereal company, said the association was, "not funny - someone could lose their job over this."

The company was unwilling to answer any questions on the topic, including whether it would now consider a rebranding of the cereal, or whether it would examine the street drugs knowledge of its branding teams to find out whether there was any mischief behind the development of the new concept.

The company did however release a terse statement: "Kelloggs' Coco Pops Coco Rocks is a popular new cereal. The cereal contains chocolate-lined rock-shaped pillows [a technical term for a widened cereal flake shape]."

The Coco Rocks concept was initially launched outside the UK without mishap. But it follows in a long line of international brands which don't translate well to new markets. Like these:

Spunk - Danish sweet bar
Zit Lemon-lime - Greek soft drink
Colon Plus Liquid - Spanish detergent
Polio - Czech detergent
Krapp - Swedish toilet paper
Homo Sausage Beef jerky - Japan
Mucos - Japanese soft drink
Pansy - Chinese men's underwear
Fockink - Dutch liqueur
Pshitt - French soft drink

We have two ears and one mouth

Perhaps the two most important things salespeople can understand is:

1. The information in their own head is not as important as the yet-to-be-mined information in their prospect's head
2. Knowing how to talk little enough and listen long enough, to be able to mine that gold

The lesson is similar for small business owners who've gone to a lot of trouble and expense to hire smart employees. We already know what we know; we need to know what's in the heads of the members of our business employees and network members. We need our folks to be open and productive with their ideas about problem-solving and business strategy.

How do we do that? Not by behaving like we're sitting on our throne with all the answers, that's for sure. Instead, let's consider the thinking of author Peter Drucker, who said, "My greatest strength as a consultant is to be ignorant, and ask a few questions."

I know you're very proud of what you've learned and how much you've accomplished. And you should be. But if your business isn't hitting on all cylinders; if your plans just aren't coming to fruition like you intended; if you don't seem to be getting the most out of your investment in the other humans in your business; perhaps you should try acting ignorant and ask a few more questions.

Laughter - the Best Form of Medicine

How good are you at laughing at yourself?

Literary great, Katherine Mansfield wrote, "It is of immense importance to laugh at ourselves."

If I didn't laugh at myself I would miss the best laughs of my life.

Can you do it? It doesn't come easily to some. You might have to practice, but there are definite benefits.

Laughing at yourself humanises you to those who live, work, and associate with you. It disarms your detractors. And, in those rare moments when you are less than perfect, laughing at yourself can actually cut you some slack, and turn a pregnant moment or fauz pas into an opportunity to bond. Sounds like a pretty handy tool to me. What do you think?

We all do things that are unintended. When it happens, so will laughter, whether right in front of you, or later behind your back. Either way, it will be at your expense, so you might as well participate.

Don't take yourself too seriously. That next mistake you are already dreading could become the best laugh you've had all day.

News Releases

The news release is your only chance to make a good first impression. Sloppy, inaccurate, pointless releases are the first to hit the newsroom wastebasket or recycle bin. To make sure yours isn’t one of them, avoid these seven deadly sins:

1. Providing insufficient or wrong information. Particularly telephone numbers. Releases must be complete, accurate and specific.
2. Writing too long. They should be no longer than two pages, preferably one page.
3. Sending it too late. Mail or fax it at least two weeks before an event, preferably three or four. Send them four to six months ahead for major magazines.
4. Sending a release with no news value. News is what happens that is different. If it isn't different, it isn't news.
5. Blatant commercialism. Avoid hackneyed words and phrases such as spectacular, incredible, the only one of its kind, breakthrough, cutting-edge, unique and state-of-the-art.
6. Omitting a contact name and phone number. At the top of the first, page in the left corner, let editors know who they can call if they have questions.
7. Calling after you send a release. Questions like "Did you get my news release?" or "Do you know when it will be printed?" will brand you as a pest. Don't follow up with a phone call to see if the media got your release, unless you are absolutely sure that someone will check for you. Most reporters and editors don't have time.

Still afraid of sinning? " Talk to a reporter in the area of your business to see what is appropriate.

© 2003 The Nework Centre   |   email neworknz@yahoo.co.nz

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